I'm the kind of human wreckage that you love.

My name is Iris, but you can call me Bob.

You will never figure me out, so stop trying.

I’m painfully shy until you get to know me.

I curse more than I should.

I laugh at horrific things.

I find beauty in the grotesque.

I tell dirty jokes to pass the time.

I'm a little crazy.

I'm constantly jealous of others.

I do this thing where I make a bunch of huge mistakes without learning from them.

I’m know I'm a headcase. But I like being the dysfunctional gal I am.

I really don’t care what you think about me.

I live life for me. I don't need your judgments.

My friends are my world && I would literally be dead without a few of them.

Fuck with them && I will fuck with you.

I am attempting to master the art of inscrutability so I will never get hurt.

It isn’t working.

I’m just an over-caffeinated under achiever with dreams of ruling the world.

I collect MAC makeup, passport stamps, concert ticket stubs && scars.

I miss the days of hair metal && real rock n' roll.

I'm addicted to Red Bull, good music, && drunk dancing.

If I had it my way it would always be autumn && I would only wear Betsey Johnson dresses.

Music, photography, art, && writing are my passions.

One day soon I'll have my own E! True Hollywood Story.

Marlboro Reds. dancing. finding beauty in the grotesque. rain. physical collisions. big jewelery. things that are well designed (see: the paperclip/the Ferragamo platform.)Spanish wine. espresso. art history. rosemary gelato. tambourines. Italian horror films. Arthur Miller. black && white photography. old diners. laughing. vinyl collections. summer. the beach. grunge. bleach. love. greaser boys. loud music. late nights. rhinestones. leather pants. hair dye. texting. London. plaid. bass. Courtney Love. sleeping in. pretty people. poetry. traveling. cocaine. body modification. drag queens. my wife [BFF]. jazz. cowboys. nightclubs. graffiti. sex. 1970 VW Bugs. band-aids. lemonade. big sunglasses. eyeliner. lace. oleander bushes. thai food. handcuffs. neon signs.

is my everything. i feel more alive at shows then anywhere else.

9 Dead Gay Guys, A Little Princess, American Beauty, An Interview With A Vampire, Bend It Like Beckham, Brick, Chumscrubber, Clerks, Closer, Donnie Darko, Elephant, Ghost World, Happy Endings, Hard Candy, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, House of Sand and Fog, I Heart The Huckabees, Hostel, Last Days, L4yer Cake, The Little Mermaid, Little Miss Sunshine, Lost In Translation, May, Mean Girls, Mysterious Skin, Office Space, Pretty Persuasion, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Saw, The Science of Sleep, The Scream series, The Secretary, Thumbsucker, Trainspotting, Trans America, The United States of Leland, Velvet Goldmine, Welcome to the Dollhouse..

Best Week Ever, FUSE.

anything by Francesca Lia Block, Nick Hornby, Sophie Kinsella, or Milan Kundera.